The Truth About Begging: Why It’s Not What You Think
I feel that I am the perfect person to speak on this topic because I am an expert fawner. I have single-handedly mastered the art of groveling and begging for mercy in the face of danger—and I have been ostracized for it. But what I’ve noticed is that the people who have the audacity to mock someone’s desperate attempts at certainty are the very same people who go out of their way to make them “beg.”
I hesitate to use the word begging when describing the phenomenon I most often experience because its definition is too general—and I don’t believe people are using it correctly.
What Is Begging, Really?
According to the dictionary, begging means to ask for something earnestly or to implore someone to do something. But when I have been forced to "beg," it’s rarely a simple request. It’s usually an argumentative power struggle—one where the other person is adamant about misunderstanding me, forcing me to reiterate, over-explain, and plead for basic recognition.
In these instances, as one can imagine, one can only “beg.”
But is that actually begging?
If we’re being technical—as most defiant individuals who force others to beg tend to be—the answer is no. Explaining oneself and attempting to have a reasonable conversation is not begging. But unfortunately, the society we live in has confused:
Confidence with cockiness
Authenticity with ego
Intelligence with ignorance
All for one thing: validation.
The Ugly Truth About Validation
I won’t define validation for you, but I can tell you this—people who suppress their true nature aren’t getting much of it.
But for the 1% of people who do? I’d imagine they’d agree when I say:
True begging is the beginning of something beautiful.
It is the ultimate expression of self-worth. It says, I am deserving of everything I want, and I will not rest until I have it. It is the highest act of self-love, especially in an era where stepping outside of the box is the equivalent of trying to high-five someone… and getting left hanging.
People Who Beg Love Themselves. People Who Force Others to Beg Do Not.
Let’s be clear: people who beg—truly beg—love themselves. Especially if they are doing it in the most traditional sense.
Recently, I ended a romantic fling with someone who absolutely deserved it. I made it very clear that I no longer wanted him to contact me. And what did he do?
He continued to call me using his main phone line.
When I blocked that number, he started sending me CashApp requests just to message me.
When that failed, he used his iCloud account to text me again.
I then took it upon myself to send him a list of all the serious reasons I no longer wanted to engage with him—laying out, in writing, the vile things he had done to me, in addition to this harassment.
And he STILL continued to message me, dismissing my words and begging for a place in my life.
I have since blocked him on Instagram, Snapchat, and YouTube.
Will you ever find me bragging about the level of disrespect this person has for me? No. It’s embarrassing.
I do not wish to share that I was ever involved with someone who cares so little for me as a human being.
So the next time you claim someone “begged” you, think about what that really means.
Because when someone is made to beg, it’s rarely about neediness or desperation—it’s about power, ego, and the people who refuse to listen until you’re on your knees.
